obscuredbyclouds ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆: Dreams aren't what they used to be

It occurred to me last night that it's been a whole year since I left Korea. In fact a year ago to the day that I'm posting this, 27 May 2023, was my first full day in Japan after doing a midnight run from Korea the day before. Korea was genuinely traumatic, a term I don't use lightly, and not an experience I like to talk about. Mostly because when you've been bullied, harassed, and manipulated, for some reason people who were never there and have no experience of the culture still want to gaslight and victim blame - especially with peoples current romanticized ideals of Korea thanks to their pop culture.

By contrast, Japan is one of my favourite places that I've ever been to, and somewhere I've never ever felt unsafe. I lived there before Korea, and the experiences couldn't have been more different. When I needed to escape Korea, Japan felt like a safe haven. The trip ended up being a very strange experience as I'd had grand plans of having a proper vacation with each and every day itinerized, but it didn't happen like that in the end. After living in survival mode for 7 months I physically and emotionally crashed and just wanted to seek comfort in my old haunts in Tokyo that were familiar to me, and I'm so thankful to Japan for being so kind to me and that I got to have the opportunity to heal there. And I'm actually not regretful of my time in Korea even though it was such a negative one. There's a Walt Disney quote that says "You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you." and that's how I feel about it now as it encouraged me to re-evaluate my trajectory and what's actually important to me, and gave me the courage to do it.

Like I said, May 27 was my first full day in Japan. The previous night had been spent in a capsule hotel, and the night before that was spent in the terminal of Incheon Airport, so I spent that Sunday drifting around Shinjuku waiting to check into my hotel. I went to Tokyu Hands and comfort bought some stationery, explored the new Disney Store that had opened up in the two years since I'd last been, had my favourite 7-Eleven curry in my hotel room (konbini meals are next level!) and I was asleep in bed by 6pm, where I stayed for the next 12 hours completely crashed out. And maybe that all sounds a little sad, but honestly it was bliss.

Here are some photos from that trip. It was spent entirely in Tokyo, with some day excursions to the Disney Parks. I also had a Kodak Ektar H35 which I'd bought in Korea. It's a film camera that takes half frame photos, and I've included some of those too. I've seen people use these cameras to take beautifully synchronized photos that compliment each other on either side and mine are not that. Part of what I enjoy about film photography is the naivety and instant film vibes. As soon as you put pressure on yourself for it to look a certain way the joy of the hobby is dead - plus I intended to cut the photos up anyway as the half frame aspect appealed to me as a better size for journaling (and I've also included some photos of my travel journal)